Friday, June 6, 2014

The Marking of Time

Maybe I've looked forward to the end of this school year so much and so hard that the reality of its coming is now somehow underwhelming.  I'm in a strange place.  Okay - those of you who've visited here more than once might be thinking, So what else is new?  It's a stranger kind of strange place, though.  I've done this all before, this getting a classroom shut down and packed away for the summer.  This getting my heart and spirit ready for the days of freedom that lie ahead.  So, this year why does it feel like I've never done it before?

On the cerebral level I know that one week from today I'll be able so sleep until I feel like waking up.  That when I get my feet on the floor I'll have nothing in particular that I have to do.  That every day for the two months or so that follow will be days of my choosing what to do, when to do it, how to do it, and best of all the ability to change my mind and say, "I'm not going to do a blessed thing today after all!"  But, something's lacking.  The conviction of past experience is oddly missing.

It's as if I can imagine what the days of summer vacation are going to be like, but it's also as if I've forgotten how they feel in spite of having enjoyed them for 50 years of my life, both as a student, and as the guy on the other side of the big desk.  I feel like I'm looking forward to something that I know is going to be good but without a clue as to how it's going to feel.  But, I don't understand why that is.  I've been here.  I've done this.

I suppose I'm just going to have to wait until I turn the key for the last time for this academic year to close up this room officially through August to start wallowing in what I'm imagining is going to be glorious.  Just...  I shouldn't be imagining.


kz1000st said...

You want to smile? Just think, "No Common Core for two months". You really have to start planning a big trip on the scooter Joe. Thinking of a Tour to someplace like Gettysburg, Hershey, Philadelphia or some other site might get your juices flowing. Then, not only will you have something to do, but we'll get to see how a Teacher writes, "What I Did on My Summer Vacation" in perfect grammar.

Doug Klassen said...

I agree with ks100st, Joe. Time to cut loose and have a real summer adventure on the scooter. Imagine what you'll see...strange twisting roads, unusual roadside cafes, and maybe even exotic women from other counties.

Steve Williams said...


When I was reading your idea that you could sleep in I was thinking that you could get up early and ride. But each of us is on our own path.

I find days where something feels missing as a good sign -- that I'm not locked into rote repetition or have lost any sense of wonder. Perhaps what you're feeling is a little bit of freedom from the whip of schedule and expectation and the need now to make decisions.

Sometime this summer we should cross paths!

Steve Williams
Scooter in the Sticks

Joe said...

Steve, I've been hoping to break bread with you sometime. I'm thinking Williamsport might be a decent rendezvous point, about halfway between here and your usual stomping grounds, and somewhere we can both get to easily enough while avoiding the interstates. We'll just have to find some quaint diner type place of the sort of which you often post pictures that make me wish I were there.


kz1000st said...

There you go Joe. Call it Blogger Tour 2014. Meet up with Steve, Paul Smith and any other PA. Blogger you can think of. I'm only 45 miles from Honesdale. I'm sure there's some place cheap to eat and chat there.

Doug Klassen said...

Joe and Steve meeting up? That could be epic, like Jack Kerouac meeting William S. Burroughs. Or maybe Kermit the Frog meeting Fozzie Bear. One or the other, take your pick. Regardless, it sounds like a great idea.